So how do we dethrone fear?
Well recently I held a tool box talk on exactly that, in the video (link below) I discuss primitive responses, Irrational fears and lastly systematic desensitisation which is a powerful technique often used to cure phobia by using a desensitisation hierarchy.
Take a look by clicking on the link below
Or carry on reading and together we will dethrone fear. So lets get to it...
Fear is an irrational and unreasonable response, however danger is very real.
So to provide clarity on this subject I've broken it down into three areas to provide clarity on the subject.
Danger - Irrational fear - Phobias
We may have evolved as a species but our minds are still very primitive, our minds have not really changed over the last 100,000 years and we are still very primitive beings at our core.
So our response to imminent danger still mirrors that of the hunter gatherer, we have three primitive response to danger and they are known as the three Fs.
FREEZE - FLIGHT - FIGHT
These are all very natural responses and depending on the severity of the danger, depends on your chemical response, however more often than not you will use one of these responses more frequently than the other.
You can often see a person's natural primitive response to danger when experiencing extreme cold, for example at the beach when you will witness individuals heading into the sea and while the comical actions play-out, we will see these responses in action.
Freeze - The person that stands completely still in the shallow end and exposes themselves to the cold waves by allowing the waves to crash over them.
Fight - They are the individual's that charge straight into the cold water, without hesitation and dive head first.
Flight- The individual that walks to the water dips the toe and thinks "fuck that". and you see them try to slope of sneaky, hoping that no-one has seen (which we have)
So our three primitive responses, if you're still unsure of yours, a great way to test your repossess and train it, is by using a cold shower and exposing yourself to the cold.
So now lets talk about Irrational fears
These are the true enemy of success, those irrational and unreasonable thoughts that stop us living our dreams, these are the little voices, our insecurities, our lack of confidence controlling us through fear.
In order to conquer this and dethrone fear, we must rewire the brain and reframe fear, because I think we can agree without fear our lives would be quite boring, for example that fear before a person experiences before making a parachute jump and that rush of adrenalin, which is is followed by one of the best experiences they ever experience.
So from now on we will embrace fear and use it to our advantage. Not ready yet? ok lets go deeper.
In the video I use the example of being fearful of starting your own business.
This is a very common irrational fear and is a fear that's hold us back from living the life we deserve.
So let's give you a step by step guide on how to overcome any irrational fear.
Step 1 - You must be courageous. As humans we seek security and in many of us this will be very high up in the league of your core beliefs but security or as I like to call it your comfort zone is a place where your dreams will die.
So you must dethrone security and value being courageous. It's time to leap.
Step 2 - Visualise yourself without this fear, what would life be like if you didn't hold this fear within.
If you have an irrational fear of social situations, begin to use this technique and visualise yourself being with friends have an great time, sharing jokes and being that social dynamo.
Begin to visualise yourself conquering this fear while in a relaxed state, picture yourself free of these chains of fear.
Step 3 - One of the most important, be positive and have blind faith in yourself. This sounds so simple nut so many focus on the negative aspects when making a change in life, we focus on what if it goes wrong or we are sacred of looking like failures.
So be positive, have faith and ask yourself:
Imagine if it works out?
Step 4 - Whats your motivation? If you are fearful of starting a business, remind yourself of what motivated you to want this in the first place. Our motivations work parallel with the law of attraction.
So remember your why?
Step 5 - Question fear and ask yourself questions to expose fear
Is this fear logical?
Is there any evidence for this fear?
Again if it's starting your own business, where is the evidence to back this fear? if you've never done it or lived it than the fear isn't logical.
By following these 5 steps you can truly conquer any irrational fear and once applied without doubt, you will truly conquer any fear.
Next and finally we look at systematic desensitisation and phobias.
What is systematic desensitisation?
an evidence-based therapy approach that combines relaxation techniques with gradual exposure to help you slowly overcome a phobia. ... This approach also involves the use of relaxation techniques. Both of these features make
Using this technique in the form of a hierarchy has a huge success rate and can be applied to any area of your life, by systematically following a set of steps based on your own limits. Its one of the reasons it works so well as you set your limits.
Ok so let's have a look at an example of a desensitisation hierachy and how to use it.
The step first step you need is to discover a really good relation technique and a breathing program that. works for you and relaxes you fully.
Whys is this so important?
Well as humans we can feel two opposing reciprocal emotions, so we can't feel fear while in a relaxed state.
Now you have you breathing exercises (kundalini fire breath is great) and you have your relaxation technique mastered its time to overcome your phobias of fears.
For the example of this hierachy I will use the phobia of spiders
Begin you relaxation technique and breathing framework before starting each step.
To look at a picture of a spider while practising your relaxation technique.
Touch a picture of a spider while practising your relaxation technique.
Be in the same room as spider while practising your relaxation technique.
Stand next to a spider while practising your relaxation technique.
Touch a spider while practising your relaxation technique.
Hold a spider while practising your relaxation technique.
Remember you set your limits with technique, you enter at a level you feel comfortable and add as many steps in the hiercachy until you get to the final goal.
This has a really high success rate and I've used this myself to conquer a fear of lying after being in a very traumatic flying incident. So the proof is in the pudding.
Again set you limits to your wishes.
They we have it fear dethroned and once you applied correctly you will be unstoppable.